Erstwhile Okie on St. Mark's Place. "That which hath been is now; and that which is to be hath already been; and God requireth that which is past."
Chico is no one's favorite Marx Brother.
· 1 min read
7 years ago
My Favorite Parts of the Wikipedia Entry for the 2007 film WHO'S YOUR CADDY?
1. The film was released on July 27, 2007, in the United States to universally negative reviews and commercial failure.
2. Big Boi as Christopher "C-Note" Hawkins, Bruce Bruce as Golf-Ball Eddie, Finesse Mitchell as Dread, JEFFREY JONES AS CUMMINGS
3. [Bradley Cooper and Todd Phillips] stated that during their dinner with the former president, Clinton stated that he loves comedies and his favorite comedy is WHO'S YOUR CADDY?
Averill: (Laughing hysterically watching Ernest Goes to Camp) Did you see Ernest launch that exploding toilet at the construction workers?? AHAHAHA!!
Me: Yeah, hehe.
Averill: He killed them all! AHAHAHAHA!
Me: Wh-- no, they... they all ran away. See? Ernest... Ernest didn't kill any--
Averill: AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!
Sat on a panel with the "Liberal Redneck" Trae Crowder.
"This is soooooooome football game, and I wish you were here. In fact, I wish you were here instead of me! Last week I told you that Mrs. Moskowitz was expecting a blessed event. Well last night, Mrs. Moskowitz had twins. O-KAY Mr. Moskowitz!"
Love how Groucho can seem so subversive while being totally inane.
In Soviet Russia, pig eats you.
Mamphis Tanuhsee, as Andy Kaufman called it.
I really wanted to like Kindergarten Cop 2.
· 1 min read
10 years ago
TV show idea: "Mugging with the Stars"
Episode 1: "Me and my boy just took your wallet, your watch, and your keys. But I see you still got your fancy iPhone. Probably thinking you're going to call the cops? I got a better idea. Why don't you say what's up to my friend (removes ski mask)... GEORGE LOPEZ."
Episode 2: "Don't you try to be a hero, boy. I know you probably think you vs. me, 1-on-1, it's a fair fight, but why don't you take a look right across the street. You see, I got backup. That's right, that man on the corner, ready to roll up, is... GEORGE LOPEZ."
Episode 3: "I know this seems like a bad dream, but you better realize real quick that it is real and serious as a heart attack or you might not get to walk away. Now everybody get down. This is not a drill, this is not a bad dream, and no, it's not a sitcom either, even though you might recognize my boy here (removes rubber Richard Nixon mask) as the eponymous star of ABC's "GEORGE LOPEZ".
--(to the plumber) Where should we start?
--Well you could offer me a drink.
--Where are my manners? Here it is almost 11:30 in the morning, you must be parched.
I love THE MONEY PIT.
I can never remember that Jonestown joke. The punchline's too long.
Abbott & Costello, Laurel & Hardy, Burns & Allen, and GLOVER & PESCI. If you haven't seen GONE FISHIN' yet, do yourself a favor. It is a masterwork.
Just realized that a bad Ronald Reagan impersonation is a good Peter Lorre impersonation.
· 1 min read
13 years ago
They should make a movie in which every character is played by a totally jacked body builder, but it's never alluded to. Maybe it's about some totally jacked overworked hedge fund manager and his totally jacked wife who is always hanging out with her zany best friend who is totally jacked but then one day the hedge fund manager's totally jacked estranged father is on his death bed and upon returning to his small hometown, he learns what really matters in life via the off-color wisdom of the elderly totally jacked town barber. You really have to visualize it. Like these guys can't even put their arms down all the way and yet no one seems to notice it and they're never seen exercising and they sit around in restaurants sipping wine in suits that look like they're about to burst.
Oh King Ralph... those stuffy Brits just don't know what to make of you.
Michael Keaton's 1996 comic romp MULTIPLICITY? More like GIFTFROMGODTOME!